Balancing priorities in life is a skill that many of us get wrong at some point. Even as children, there will be some who are driven by parental expectations or personal obsession to study and not play. Whilst they are likely to become ‘high achievers’ as adults in one area of life, without some adjustment to work-life balance they are prone to be ‘low achievers’ in relationships as parents and partners. At the other extreme, a child with little encouragement in education will find other outlets through sport at best or perhaps dysfunctional activities like crime, pornography, gaming and drug use. Jean-François Gravelet was born on 28 February 1824 in Hesdin, Pas-de-Calais, France – Blondin the tightrope walker. He was from a remarkable family of athletes and went on to walk across the Niagara Falls in 1859 in various ways (wheeling a barrow, carrying his manager on his back, on stilts and blindfolded) displaying amazing courage and balance. However, his personal life was less balanced. Blondin had three wives, dating his second wife-to-be when she was just 15, becoming a bigamist and ending up with 8 children. He died at the age of 72 and his third wife, Katherine, died 4 years later aged a mere 36.
- ‘I put my heart and my soul into my work, and have lost my mind in the process’ – Vincent Van Gogh
- ‘Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony’ – Thomas Merton
- ‘Faith gives you an inner strength and a sense of balance and perspective in life’ – Gregory Peck
- ‘The challenge of work-life balance is without question one of the most significant struggles faced by modern man’ – Stephen Covey
‘Office Space’ was a 1999 movie with Peter Gibbons (acted by Ron Livingston) as the man who hates his job at a software company. His frustration leads to quiet fury, deep unhappiness and unhinged behaviour. Following that came ‘The Office’ TV Series in America and Britain satirizing the daily routine and consuming demands of corporate culture endured by so many people. Whilst there is humour in all of these, they are some of many films that look at the destructive nature of a wrong work-life balance. Much is made of ‘well-being’, ‘mindfulness’ and looking after your own ‘mental health’ in these stressful times. A good place to start with this is to consider your own work-life balance – whether you work to live or live to work. Prior to that is the question of where you derive your sense of identity, value and purpose. The answers to that will shine a light on what gives you security, happiness and motivation.
There was a man who was extremely talented and hard-working. Having a famous father perhaps he felt he had a lot to live up to. This man was certainly a ‘high achiever’ but he became disenchanted with it all and he lost his way. Despite his privileged upbringing Solomon’s conclusion was a dark one:
- ‘So I hated life. That’s because the work done on this earth made me sad. None of it has any meaning. It’s like chasing the wind’ – Ecclesiastes 2:17
King Solomon went on to live a life of hedonism moving away from his first love for God as he indulged his 700 wives and 300 concubines. Despite great material success, all that he built in life failed on his death as his kingdom fell apart and Israel split because of Solomon’s son Rehoboam. Another very wealthy man was Job who, despite all his suffering, arrived at a different conclusion:
- ‘Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord’ – Job 1:21
The principle of needing good balance applies to other physical things such as a balanced diet but can also be considered in spiritual terms. For instance, an unbalanced Christian Theology can lead to excesses, distortions and divisions. Revivals that focus on phenomena will fizzle out. Church leaders who seek mega-sized churches and popularity tend to burn out or become compromised. Teachers focussing on one of the main spiritual gifts can become cultish. Where only one member of the Holy Trinity is the focus, a short-term fad develops with little lasting impact sometimes leading to skewed emphases and denominations. There needs to be a ‘Balanced Theology’ on matters of the Persons of God, the Doctrines of the Church and the Practices of Believers.
Back to some personal reflection then – do you feel you have the right balance in life? Mary and Martha were close to Jesus but one had the right focus and the other needed some realignment. Consider these verses and ask yourself if there is any need for adjustment.
- ‘As they continued their journey, Jesus came to a village and a woman called Martha welcomed him to her house. She had a sister by the name of Mary who settled down at the Lord’s feet and was listening to what he said. But Martha was very worried about her elaborate preparations and she burst in, saying, “Lord, don’t you mind that my sister has left me to do everything by myself? Tell her to get up and help me!” But the Lord answered her, “Martha, my dear, you are worried and bothered about providing so many things. Only a few things are really needed, perhaps only one. Mary has chosen the best part and you must not tear it away from her!” – Luke 10:41-42 JB Phillips
- ‘The thief’s purpose is to steal, kill and destroy. My purpose is to give life in all its fullness’ – John 10:10 TLB
- ‘The thing you should want most is God’s kingdom and doing what God wants. Then all these other things you need will be given to you’ – Matthew 6:33 ICB
Why not take some time out to reflect on these things? For your short-term well-being, your medium-term happiness and your long-term future, it’s time well spent. You may feel a wobble on the tight rope from time to time but God’s Word brings the balance to correct it if you use it like the tightrope walker’s pole. You never know when there might be a cross wind. It’s only when you lose your footing and step off the tightrope that it’s too late!
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