Is it both, either or neither? Many Christians feel a sense of split identity – saint or sinner? Perhaps sometimes feeling more ‘saintly’ whilst at other times feeling a ‘downright sinner’! Have you ever felt this? St Augustine was one such who agonised over the good person he wanted to be and the sinner that he publicly confessed himself to be. This painting of him portrays something of that tension. Born in 354 AD to Monica, a devout Christian, he had at least two mistresses, an illegitimate child and lived a life of life of hedonism ruled by lust and worldly ambition, famously saying: “God, grant me chastity and continence, but not yet”. Yet when he was 31, he became a follower of Christ, then the Bishop of Hippo laying down much Christian doctrine. Bishop Possidius of Calama recorded him as one who ‘ate sparingly, worked tirelessly, despised gossip, shunned the temptations of the flesh, and exercised prudence in finances’.
- ‘Thou hast made us for thyself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it finds its rest in thee’ – St Augustine
- ‘There's a duality in every man and every woman’ – Raquel Welch